This was a simple case of my father trying to help one of the workers in his factory. She had recently lost her husband, and the group insurance needed to be settled. However, there were some procedural delays. My dad had to come to Chennai to resolve these delays, so I decided to drive him to the insurance company for this conversation.

The delays were exasperating my father, who was keen to ensure that this worker got paid in such trying times. This exasperation led to a lot of indignation in the conversation with the insurance officer. It was so intense that I sensed that the officer was about to leave the discussion. That’s when I decided to step in.

At this point, I realized the importance of making the other person comfortable. I asked if I could take a couple of minutes to set the context for the conversation. I explained the situation that led to the untimely death and expressed how the worker must be feeling. I also highlighted that the insurance officer had the ability to ensure timely payment to this woman and questioned whether he would be motivated to help her.

Remember, in negotiation, it’s crucial to give something to get something. By showing appreciation and respect, you can prompt action. The insurance officer took it upon himself to consult with various divisional and zonal managers, obtained the necessary approvals, and returned to us.

This experience underscores that selling skills, such as persuasion, influencing, negotiating, and selling, are actually life skills. When used correctly, in the right context and sequence, they can yield higher-order results.

A few months ago, I was playing the role of a co-facilitator and co-coach during a leadership development program.

The audience comprised of the top 25 senior leaders of a global multinational. One of the discussions during the intervention called for the leaders to split into traids and practice peer coaching. During the debrief, while there was rich exchange of perspectives, one of the leaders shared some good insights about a particular framework they adopted and the results it gave them.

The facilitator listened, acknowledged then without further engagement moved on. I noticed an immediate shift in the leader’s micro expressions and body language. For the rest of the debrief, it seemed like the leader was not part of the discussion and had withdrawn from participation.

Since it was a fairly large group of senior leaders with rich experiences, lots of discussions followed, and no one noticed the non-participation from the particular leader.

As a co-coach, I was a silent witness to the dynamics at play there, and at the first opportunity I got with the facilitator, I exercised courage and shared my observations. The facilitator acted quickly and together we brought back the leader to become an active participant.

My belief to speak up and influence a situation, made a big difference to its outcomes. Getting More from each situation lies with you.

Persuasion, influencing, negotiation or selling (PINS) are not just limited for sales professionals – You and I can practice it effectively and effortlessly. #SalesSkillsAreLifeSkills indeed.

Almost a decade ago, I was between jobs. I cleared my interview with a USA-based agency setting up shop in India. In the final round, while discussing the remuneration, they said that at that point they could only match my current pay. I did ask for more, of course. But they spoke about how they are just getting started here and I was already a bit out of budget, you know that drill. I easily caved in and accepted the offer. On day 1, I met my manager who I knew personally from before. He was also part of the interview panel. We discussed how and where to get started. At the end of the meeting, because he knew me from before, he simply said ‘You know, you could have asked for more. And stood your ground for it.’

I felt let down. Cheated, even. I considered leaving but then realised that it wasn’t personal. I should have known my worth and demanded it. And that’s when I learned a bitter lesson that #SalesSkillsAreLifeSkills. And that I must learn to negotiate, especially when I’m so sure of the value I bring to the table.

Unpopular opinion: Our blog articles are products to be sold. Hear me out.

We talk about creativity, but Content is not art on paper. My journey in #content began with the realization that everything I write or commission is a story waiting to be told. Every post and #blog article with a wide reach had PERSUASION at play, weaving facts with emotions to encourage sustainable choices. I learned that persuasion, in this case, isn’t about pushing a product; it’s about crafting narratives that resonate.

Then came the chapter of INFLUENCE. I used to think it was all about the numbers – the likes, the shares, the comments. But I discovered it’s much more. It’s about building a #community , sharing experiences, and creating a space where your voice isn’t just heard but valued. Whether it was a tweet, a video, or an infographic, the #goal was to create content that speaks to hearts, not just minds.

And finally, NEGOTIATION. In #contentmarketing , this isn’t about striking deals but understanding and valuing different perspectives. It’s about creating content that balances what my audience wants with what my brand stands for. Every successful campaign was a lesson in negotiation – listening, adapting, and finding that sweet spot where everyone’s needs are met.

This journey has taught me that persuasion, influencing, and negotiation are not just tactics; they are powerful tools for storytelling. They can change perspectives, inspire actions, and build communities.

As #contentcreators , we’re not just marketing products; we share #stories , shape ideas, and build connections. And in this path, these skills are our most powerful allies.

Do let me know how you have used these sales skills in your profession or industry?

PS: The image is of 300-year-old Rogan Art, where each motif, symbolic of each story we write, is woven to form a rich tapestry (in the content world, a network) of intricate design.

It is one of the largest well known IT organizations, belonging to one of the largest Indian conglomerates. They have a big #b2bsales team, which is the basic need for positioning our #salescoaching & #salestraining solutions. I got the details of this key decision maker and tried reaching out to him.

Like how we are all currently experiencing a situation where there are so many Marketing and spam calls, this person would have also felt the same and hence didn’t pick up my calls. After multiple attempts I was able to connect with him. Within the first 1 minute of the conversation, this person shut me completely saying that whatever solutions we are providing are delivered internally by their specialists. I kept telling how our solutions are different, but he was not in a position to give me any further time and told firmly that he might not need our services.

Oh my god. I have put so much of efforts and patiently waited for such a long time to connect with this person, but I was seeing the golden opportunity slipping slowly in front of my eyes.
Finally when I highlighted the importance of having an #externalsalespartner like us instead of relying upon only internal resources, he got convinced and gave me a calendarized meeting slot.
I prepared well for this #clientmeeting and was about to start the meeting. But this person interrupted and told his counterpart, “Before we start the meeting, I want to appreciate Kumar here. The #genuineness with which he approached me and the #persistence he displayed when I kept pushing him were the reasons why we are here now”.

I thanked him for his positive acknowledgement and that gave me a lot of energy where I could #structure and #orchestrate the meeting well. Of course, at the end of the meeting, I got the desired positive result and they became our #customer subsequently.

Genuineness and persistence are important sales qualities for any sales person to gain trust from their customers. Not only for sales, it applies to life in general. I always believe that #SalesSkillsAreLifeSkills.

Would you believe this and like to share your story?

It is interesting how much you could learn from tradespeople. I was in Sydney last week – it was wonderful to feel the cold nip in the air again. I have always felt the Australian pride with their R.M. Williams boots – over the years, they had become part of my wardrobe as well. This Craftsman boot, however, was feeling quite tight, and I decided to get it set right.

I headed out to the Strand, a 1891 Victorian style building on Pitt Street, to find another customer ahead of me in the store. It gave me the opportunity to observe the store owner in action. This customer had a Louis Vuitton cloth bag from which he took out a sneaker to complain about a biting sensation around the heel. I observed that this customer was nattily dressed and exuded an aura of money – surely, an opportunity for the store owner to levy a hefty bill.

What happened next surprised me – the store owner pulled out a small cushioning pad from his shelf, adjusted it within the heel of the shoe and told his customer that his problem should now be resolved. The customer pulled out his wallet to pay, but the owner declined. He would only charge if it was a bigger issue. The surprised customer smiled, thanked him, and left.

It was now my turn. I smiled at the owner and said, “Did you observe how happy that customer was, when he left?”. The shop owner introduced himself as Robert and said that he did that often to his customers – surprise them with genuine service and never charge for trivia. Robert was curious to find out what I did for a living, and I told him that I had the pleasurable vocation of coaching leaders.

Robert shared that he had been a Rugby coach for 27 years before opening this shop. He coached the cerebral kids at Sydney Grammar to stand up to the stronger, faster kids from other school districts. His mantra was not to push but to use the art of the nudge – 1% better every day. I smiled as I recalled Atomic Habits by James Clear: 1.01 to the power of 365 equals 37.8. A 1% improvement every day yielded 38 times better results by the end of the year, and Robert knew this instinctively.

It was now his turn to examine my boots, and he said that it would take at least 3 days to get it fixed. I was leaving the next day, so he promised to send the shoes to Singapore. He took down my address, shared his contact details and I pulled out my phone to pay. He said that I could pay only after I have received the shoes and it met my satisfaction. I was taken aback and asked him how he could trust a stranger so much. He said “Sir, After all, it’s only a pair of boots!!”. We smiled warmly at each other, shook hands, and I took my leave.

On reflection, I realised that here was a tradesman who lived the truism of “Go Givers get more”. He invested in his customers, led with trust, and acted with integrity – making every customer visit memorable. I wonder how all of us can make every customer meeting memorable every day.

How could your art of giving, beget you more?

Children have their own way of making you see what is beyond yourself. Usually a guru tells you this, but children have a beautiful way of doing it. For example, around 15 years back, I wanted to give up my job. So, one morning, I got up and I said, I’m not going to work. My husband thought it was for one day and left for work. My daughter was going to school. She was only six years old. She stepped out and then stepped back in and asked “What do you mean? Are you saying you’re not working today?” I said, “No, I’m not going to work forever.” I told her I was tired. Between home and running to work, I was just tired. And she asked me, “What else would you do, if you’re not working?” I could not say that I will figure it out. I had taken a decision, but I did not think beyond that. I think the open mindedness to discover myself every day is my purpose.

It is not about setting a goal; it is about commitment to the goal. There is a lot of research that says that companies that have lasted long had commitment to their goals. Goals should be huge, stretched and maybe even unreasonable and these need to be set with a 10x mentality. There is a story about the Spanish conquest of Mexico, where the commander told his men to “Burn the Boats” giving them no option but to either conquer or die. Visions should not fade in the light of day-to-day problems. Take your time setting your goals, but once done stay committed.

It was a lovely Friday evening in Auckland and we decided to end our workshop slightly early for everyone to get back to their families. Tom stepped up to me and asked if I could spare some time for him. He was a Sales Director and wanted some coaching. My flight was only the next day back to Singapore and we decided to meet on Saturday morning for a post-breakfast coffee.

Auckland is a beautiful city – I could still recall the sun-soaked pier where we sat down at a table, with seagulls screeching all around. I could see the multiple boats ferrying tourists, perhaps taking them for some whale and dolphin watching. We started talking about managing time, building teams, leveraging talent and utilising technology.The conversation naturally veered towards customers and I asked him “What would it take for you and your team to make every meeting memorable for your customers?”. He started to think and came up with a few good pointers – I could sense that all of these related to reason and not connected with emotion. It was important for Tom to realise and appreciate the power of emotion.

I switched perspectives then to ask him “Tell me about your most memorable meeting this month”. Without a moment’s hesitation, he said “This one. In fact, I think this is probably the best meeting I had this year”. I was taken aback but secretly very pleased. Rather than revel in the oxytocin, I decided to stretch his thinking “What specifically makes it so memorable?” He said ” Well, it is the genuine connection I feel with you – you really want to make me successful. You are asking the right questions to make me think, and I know that I am taking down a number of actions that will change my future”.

This was his moment of insight, and all I needed to do was to the reframe the context again. “So, what would it take for you and your team to have similar conversations with your customers?” He smiled – Tom was smart enough to understand what was now expected of him and his team. We wished each other well and promised to keep in touch.

I now realise that this meeting was memorable for me as well – I realised the power of a genuine connection, focusing on others’ success, and the power of asking hard questions in a soft way.

Can these simple skills make the world a better place? – Most certainly, and all it takes is for all of us to move from instinctual responses to intentional engagements, where everything is focused on making the other person greater. What is your set of life skills that is unleashing greatness in others?